From Isolation to Connection: How To Partner With Loneliness and Build Stronger Relationships

According to Mckinsey Research, loneliness and social isolation can be as damaging to an individual’s health as smoking 15 cigarettes per day.

Yes, you read that correctly…15 cigarettes in a day.

I remember discussing my struggles with loneliness, and how it was affecting my overall sense of self, during one of my first ever therapy sessions,

And, as so many of us know, the hard part about loneliness is you can be surrounded by people and still experience loneliness. So, clearly, the answer to loneliness is not merely being surrounded by more people, but is found in having the capacity to connect with those people.

But, here’s the thing. While people and safe spaces can help alleviate loneliness, working through it is an inside job.

So, here are three ways that I worked through my own loneliness and developed stronger connections in my relationships, whether at work or at home.

1. Reframe it the loneliness

It’s so easy to think that something is wrong with you when you’re experiencing loneliness. But what I’ve realized in my own journey is that loneliness is often times the prerequisite to more capacity for deeper relationships.

So, reframe it. It’s not an obstacle - but an invitation.

2. Don’t fight loneliness, parter with it.

In other words, get curious about it. So often we judge ourselves for the loneliness that we’re experiencing and it's the judgement that magnifies it. And when we judge it, we're working against it. Instead, partner with it. Get curious about it.

What can it teach you? How can you grow from it?

3. Talk about it - but not to anyone and everyone.

Brené Brown talks about how not everyone is qualified to hear your story and it's so damn true. Find someone who you know is emotionally safe and then ask them if or when they have the space to talk about it and let them in.

Yes, it's vulnerable but it's this vulnerability that connects us in a deeper way and eases the loneliness.

Rooting for you.

Research: https://www.mckinsey.com/featured-insights/themes/loneliness-is-bad-for-your-health-heres-what-to-do-about-it